Promising to swear off traffic stories, I do understand that there are other points of focus- stories worth telling. Somewhere in the blog world, things can get muddy. I suppose it is all about returning to audience and remembering who you are writing for and why. Unless you're a nonblogging blogger like me who is mostly just writing to make sense of muddled thoughts and incoherent experiences.
I think, back in the beginning of this whole experience, I spent a lot more time examining my inner conflicts and confusions publicly- though I admit to trying to keep a very low profile. According to my stat counts, I am still pretty low profile but definitely more aware that anyone can find me here. Students, parents of a student, friends, enemies.....anyone. And it affects what I am willing to put out there. To be fair, I think I understand the blogging field to be one of lighthearted comments on life...or, to describe the academic blogs I keep up with- succinct points of view on pertinent developments in the field (of whatever topic the blog is about.)
Of course there is an overwhelming number of us who began just to keep friends and family updated on our lives from a distance. My friend- mentor, workout encourager and overall hero of fitness blogs here and admits freely to searching for topics to write about. Because after awhile, life is life. Finding ways to make it interesting and unusual can be a daunting task in the face of a Kinshasa afternoon. At one point she states:
"My excuse for the last 2ish weeks has been that life has been full of heart wrenching "stuff", disappointment, broken promises and things that are hard to deal with
sometimes! That is all I will say about that....................."
She goes on to come up with a list of 20 items that could serve to satisfy those interested in her well being. But of course, I got stuck back at the introduction. At the "heart wrenching stuff." Because sometimes that's the stuff we need to hear from people we know to make us feel like we're not alone in our struggles, to make us feel a bit more human and occasionally, to help us find some purpose (yes, I can support you through this. Let me help.)
While I admire her greatly and look forward to taking her classes, we're not actually that close. So I have no idea what the "stuff" is or how she is handling it. I am nowhere near socially adept enough to know how to bring it up or how to move our friendship closer. I am reminded of someone else on campus who came right up and planted herself firmly in front of me, asking a barrage of questions I was completely unprepared for. It turned me into a babbling idiot spouting out much more personal information in those 4 minutes than I have ever shared with her in our 6 years of working together. And, no, I don't especially feel any closer to her or more like a friend. So that's probably not the approach I will emulate.
But it does leave me wondering. About the stories we choose to tell, and the ideas that vulnerability makes you stronger or more likeable. Not that I am especially trying to be either. Sometimes I do regret the stories I have told, or the audience I have told them to, but mostly I am busy trying to keep it all tucked away someplace private where it can't be dissected or judged or too closely examined.
You can't really be a successful writer like that, can you?
23.10.13
Why I can't believe this....
Haven't been to the airport in...ahem....a really long time (unfortunately.) But apparently there is a new guardian of traffic.....this lovely robot- which is a grand excuse for another traffic story. While it's amazing that the robot is outfitted with a surveillance camera....I'm just not sure what it plans to do with the photos. And I have an incredibly hard time believing motorists will accept the guidance of mere metal.
Mostly due to what I witnessed yesterday.....which made me nostalgic (not for the first time) for those 4-way stop sign intersections. You know the ones....you arrive there at the same time as another car, you both start to go, make eye contact and then wave each other on...which then results in a bit of confusion about who should actually go first because you are both just too polite to make the move. Inevitably you both sit for a minute pondering the situation before someone makes the go ahead.
In Kinshasa however, things don't go exactly like that. My "favorite" carrefour- 4-way intersection- has a completely different ambiance. Arriving here, one must make a death-defying dash across the roadway, forcing the vehicle in between oncoming traffic, turning taxis and pedestrians. No one stops to let anyone else pass. Even in the presence of the policewoman trying her hardest to maintain order and direct traffic.
Yesterday as we were passing through, she had her arms out and back facing the other lane. A clear signal for them to stop. We had the "green." But the large taxi buses didn't stop and kept turning into our lane despite her signal and my furious hand gestures and screaming at them. "Ce claire, ce vous qui doit arrete!" They didn't really care, just smiled and shrugged and kept on driving. Until there is an accident. Which was bound to happen. One of the large taxi buses hit another large SUV trying to make the turn. The policewoman was now completely surround by cars on all sides, each at their own angle directly aimed at an oncoming vehicle. A real life pick up stix game with no clear solution on who should- or even can- move first to unravel the whole mess. The two drivers involved in the accident begin shouting at one another, which is a process that must run it's full course, further blocking traffic until they've each exhausted themselves.
Most incredulously, after the heated screaming match, they both drove away, one with a patch of scratches and white paint on his front bumper. No insurance reports, no police reports, no police comment on the entire affair in fact and...I guess, no harm done- this time.
While I am impressed to hear that it was a woman's engineering group that came up with the robot model.....I think the aspect they are truly missing is the social/legal implications. There needs to be consequences. In the wild west of Kinshasa, you can easily drive on the wrong side of the road, drive on the sidewalk, pass on the left- or the right- drive down the middle of the road creating the infamous "third lane" and sometimes even a fourth and fifth lane or whatever other driving whims you might have in the moment (stopping in the middle of the road to take on or discharge passengers for example.)
The robot is reported to be able to change height (if I am reading that right....it gets a little hedgy with the French) and so perhaps it wouldn't be too much to add in a mechanism where it can descend from it's perch and tap drivers over the head when they commit an infraction. Just a little tap.
UPDATE: The very same day I wrote this post, I ended up driving past the robot. Turns out it's not very near the airport just out by the palace du peuple. It wasn't impressive or imposing. In fact, if I hadn't written this, I might not have even noticed it. I wasn't driving so that makes a bit of a difference, but it blended in with all the other metal of the traffic. It wasn't very tall and didn't stand out at all. We were half way past it before I even realized it. In the end, I can see it would never be the threatening figure that would be able to get down and give wayward drivers a wallop.
Mostly due to what I witnessed yesterday.....which made me nostalgic (not for the first time) for those 4-way stop sign intersections. You know the ones....you arrive there at the same time as another car, you both start to go, make eye contact and then wave each other on...which then results in a bit of confusion about who should actually go first because you are both just too polite to make the move. Inevitably you both sit for a minute pondering the situation before someone makes the go ahead.
In Kinshasa however, things don't go exactly like that. My "favorite" carrefour- 4-way intersection- has a completely different ambiance. Arriving here, one must make a death-defying dash across the roadway, forcing the vehicle in between oncoming traffic, turning taxis and pedestrians. No one stops to let anyone else pass. Even in the presence of the policewoman trying her hardest to maintain order and direct traffic.
Yesterday as we were passing through, she had her arms out and back facing the other lane. A clear signal for them to stop. We had the "green." But the large taxi buses didn't stop and kept turning into our lane despite her signal and my furious hand gestures and screaming at them. "Ce claire, ce vous qui doit arrete!" They didn't really care, just smiled and shrugged and kept on driving. Until there is an accident. Which was bound to happen. One of the large taxi buses hit another large SUV trying to make the turn. The policewoman was now completely surround by cars on all sides, each at their own angle directly aimed at an oncoming vehicle. A real life pick up stix game with no clear solution on who should- or even can- move first to unravel the whole mess. The two drivers involved in the accident begin shouting at one another, which is a process that must run it's full course, further blocking traffic until they've each exhausted themselves.
Most incredulously, after the heated screaming match, they both drove away, one with a patch of scratches and white paint on his front bumper. No insurance reports, no police reports, no police comment on the entire affair in fact and...I guess, no harm done- this time.
While I am impressed to hear that it was a woman's engineering group that came up with the robot model.....I think the aspect they are truly missing is the social/legal implications. There needs to be consequences. In the wild west of Kinshasa, you can easily drive on the wrong side of the road, drive on the sidewalk, pass on the left- or the right- drive down the middle of the road creating the infamous "third lane" and sometimes even a fourth and fifth lane or whatever other driving whims you might have in the moment (stopping in the middle of the road to take on or discharge passengers for example.)
The robot is reported to be able to change height (if I am reading that right....it gets a little hedgy with the French) and so perhaps it wouldn't be too much to add in a mechanism where it can descend from it's perch and tap drivers over the head when they commit an infraction. Just a little tap.
UPDATE: The very same day I wrote this post, I ended up driving past the robot. Turns out it's not very near the airport just out by the palace du peuple. It wasn't impressive or imposing. In fact, if I hadn't written this, I might not have even noticed it. I wasn't driving so that makes a bit of a difference, but it blended in with all the other metal of the traffic. It wasn't very tall and didn't stand out at all. We were half way past it before I even realized it. In the end, I can see it would never be the threatening figure that would be able to get down and give wayward drivers a wallop.
16.10.13
Time well spent
I signed up to be the faculty adviser to the elementary student council this year thinking I could steer us away from bake sales and food drives. While I hadn't a strong clear idea about what a student council actually does (all my experience hearing about if from the middle and high school speeches refer to "blow-outs," "shut-ins," and other party slang that basically throws up images of all those 80's Tom-Cruise-in-high-school flicks.)
I did have some ideas however and a little research confirmed that most student councils are busy with three main agendas: 1. Creating spirit (that's where the parties and movie nights come in) 2. Raising awareness about issues that are important to them or that are "current events" 3. Community service and/or involvement- creating a bridge between the student body and the community. Of course, it's this last one that drew me in.
Mostly, my idea was (and still is) to try and lead the students through the process of making decisions and working as a group. The rest is up to them. We are responsible for running the elementary school store which was recently created and that comes with another whole set of ideas, complications and possibilities.
But first, the spirit. They wanted to organize a movie night which actually turned out quite great. They were able to work through a process of voting and reducing their choices until we had a winner- the delightful Hotel Transylvania. It worked out perfectly as a pre-Halloween movie and the kids dressed up as ghouls and goblins to make the evening more fun for the movie goers.
The kids worked hard to make and stuff 95 bags of popcorn and mix up enough "Energade" drink for all. There were moments of small chaos, perhaps not everyone received their choice of popcorn (or arrived late and didn't get any at all) but in general it was a successful night of fun and festivities.
So I was kind of excited about our next meeting. We were going to plan out a few more activities, begin our discussion of the community service projects and maybe even paint the lizard mascot on our school store door. Ha! Elementary stuco shutdown.
Rather we ended up spending the hour talking and making very few decisions. One well- intentioned member kept shooting every idea down with "Well, some people might not like....." I had to finally tell her yes, some people might not like it or might not be able to participate or just plain might not.....but our job was to provide opportunity for the masses.....not try to cater to each individual desire.
Other ideas seemed boring to me or unclear (though, I did try to ask those uncovering kinds of questions that would enlighten things- and not make judgments about what 10 year-olds think is a fun idea. I really do want it be their show.) The problem was, they couldn't decide. They wanted to talk about Valentine's Day or the end of the year, but no one wanted to talk about next month. They wanted Christmas Parties and Gift Giving (how could you organize gift giving for 120 students?! I tried to steer them towards "end of the year" rather than "Christmas" and secret pal notes, appreciations and drawings rather than buying gifts.....they didn't seem too interested.)
We went around and around with no final thoughts (we did manage to schedule in a "Dress as your favorite character" D.E.A.R day.) It was excruciating. We moved on to talking about community service. Bake Sales, Food Drives, Clothing Gives. I knew this was coming but the previous 45 minutes had depleted all of my energy. I tried to explain the idea of searching for something more than bringing in their old, cast-off items to give to people they barely knew. I tried to explain the idea of sharing an experience, of creating a relationship...of doing more than just handing over unused items.
It was a challenging sell. In the end, someone did suggest visiting another school, along with a few other ideas I have completely forgotten now in trying to put the pain and frustration of that meeting behind me. A lot of their ideas involved other teachers (for which I had to explain again and again that it is completely voluntary and I can't make the other teachers participate in anything, or give up their evenings to join us or give up their class time to our half-formed ideas- or even worse, give up their class time to then plan some completely new lesson that would fit nicely into our ideas....whew!)
Afterward, I really needed a moment of self-reflection. Or a whole day. Luckily we had Eid off and so I had exactly that- a whole day of reflection. I tried to imagine what kind of community service project would be "good enough" and would make me feel that it is authentic and genuine and not condescending. I remembered my time at Stand Proud just going to make art with the kids (and forcing my own boys to come because I thought it was a good experience for them.) I thought of the orphanages and day centers I'd gone to filled with kids who just want someone to pay attention to them, read a book, play a game. Isn't that enough? It is something completely accessible to the students and completely age appropriate. Spend some time with another child. Doing child things.
I realized I have a bit of inner work to do in order to get over my complications with giving. Kinshasa does funny things to a person's sense of charity. Life has been fraught with traumatic events this month, both my own and in lives of dear friends. It's made sleep nearly impossible to come by leaving me short on patience and understanding. But this Eid I think I have made something of a small breakthrough. Gathering food and old shoes and clothes may be something the kids are familiar with, something they know about, but giving time is equally valuable. Maybe I can help them take the second step in giving- learning that it is not always about the material things. And then, when an occasion comes for the gifting, we'll have real reason and real relationships to support it.
Eid Mubarak.
I did have some ideas however and a little research confirmed that most student councils are busy with three main agendas: 1. Creating spirit (that's where the parties and movie nights come in) 2. Raising awareness about issues that are important to them or that are "current events" 3. Community service and/or involvement- creating a bridge between the student body and the community. Of course, it's this last one that drew me in.
Mostly, my idea was (and still is) to try and lead the students through the process of making decisions and working as a group. The rest is up to them. We are responsible for running the elementary school store which was recently created and that comes with another whole set of ideas, complications and possibilities.
But first, the spirit. They wanted to organize a movie night which actually turned out quite great. They were able to work through a process of voting and reducing their choices until we had a winner- the delightful Hotel Transylvania. It worked out perfectly as a pre-Halloween movie and the kids dressed up as ghouls and goblins to make the evening more fun for the movie goers.
 |
| Making 3 kinds of popcorn- cheese, chocolate & butter 'n salt |
 |
| Nabih - Vampire Master |
 |
| Spreading his "wings" |
The kids worked hard to make and stuff 95 bags of popcorn and mix up enough "Energade" drink for all. There were moments of small chaos, perhaps not everyone received their choice of popcorn (or arrived late and didn't get any at all) but in general it was a successful night of fun and festivities.
So I was kind of excited about our next meeting. We were going to plan out a few more activities, begin our discussion of the community service projects and maybe even paint the lizard mascot on our school store door. Ha! Elementary stuco shutdown.
Rather we ended up spending the hour talking and making very few decisions. One well- intentioned member kept shooting every idea down with "Well, some people might not like....." I had to finally tell her yes, some people might not like it or might not be able to participate or just plain might not.....but our job was to provide opportunity for the masses.....not try to cater to each individual desire.
Other ideas seemed boring to me or unclear (though, I did try to ask those uncovering kinds of questions that would enlighten things- and not make judgments about what 10 year-olds think is a fun idea. I really do want it be their show.) The problem was, they couldn't decide. They wanted to talk about Valentine's Day or the end of the year, but no one wanted to talk about next month. They wanted Christmas Parties and Gift Giving (how could you organize gift giving for 120 students?! I tried to steer them towards "end of the year" rather than "Christmas" and secret pal notes, appreciations and drawings rather than buying gifts.....they didn't seem too interested.)
We went around and around with no final thoughts (we did manage to schedule in a "Dress as your favorite character" D.E.A.R day.) It was excruciating. We moved on to talking about community service. Bake Sales, Food Drives, Clothing Gives. I knew this was coming but the previous 45 minutes had depleted all of my energy. I tried to explain the idea of searching for something more than bringing in their old, cast-off items to give to people they barely knew. I tried to explain the idea of sharing an experience, of creating a relationship...of doing more than just handing over unused items.
It was a challenging sell. In the end, someone did suggest visiting another school, along with a few other ideas I have completely forgotten now in trying to put the pain and frustration of that meeting behind me. A lot of their ideas involved other teachers (for which I had to explain again and again that it is completely voluntary and I can't make the other teachers participate in anything, or give up their evenings to join us or give up their class time to our half-formed ideas- or even worse, give up their class time to then plan some completely new lesson that would fit nicely into our ideas....whew!)
Afterward, I really needed a moment of self-reflection. Or a whole day. Luckily we had Eid off and so I had exactly that- a whole day of reflection. I tried to imagine what kind of community service project would be "good enough" and would make me feel that it is authentic and genuine and not condescending. I remembered my time at Stand Proud just going to make art with the kids (and forcing my own boys to come because I thought it was a good experience for them.) I thought of the orphanages and day centers I'd gone to filled with kids who just want someone to pay attention to them, read a book, play a game. Isn't that enough? It is something completely accessible to the students and completely age appropriate. Spend some time with another child. Doing child things.
I realized I have a bit of inner work to do in order to get over my complications with giving. Kinshasa does funny things to a person's sense of charity. Life has been fraught with traumatic events this month, both my own and in lives of dear friends. It's made sleep nearly impossible to come by leaving me short on patience and understanding. But this Eid I think I have made something of a small breakthrough. Gathering food and old shoes and clothes may be something the kids are familiar with, something they know about, but giving time is equally valuable. Maybe I can help them take the second step in giving- learning that it is not always about the material things. And then, when an occasion comes for the gifting, we'll have real reason and real relationships to support it.
Eid Mubarak.
15.10.13
How buildings go down...
This disturbing article appeared in my FB feed this morning. Construction is prevalent all over Kinshasa and meant to be a sign of the up-and-coming economy and development.
The problem of course lies within the means of achieving this prosperous goal. The article suggests that faulty materials used in the building may be the cause of the collapse. I am left to wonder who exactly, if anyone, knew about the inferior metal.
Was it the owner of the building, hoping to cut a few corners and save some cash? Was it the construction company themselves, hoping to shave dollars off the cost and pocket the difference? Was it the vendor of the iron bars- knowing the material was not suitable for such construction but selling it anyway?
Other questions abound as well- often I have wondered about the half-built buildings and the people that inhabit them, whether new owners of apartments or squatters who've found a temporary place to stay. It's not a sight I am accustomed to seeing in the US- half- formed buildings already open for business. I'm pretty sure there is some kind of inspection process required at several stages of construction and again upon completion.
The rescue team surely had it's work cut out. It was dismaying to read that perhaps witnesses heard the cries of children (or the cries of anyone) that were unable to be found. Watching the building go down, it appeared there was time to get out, though it is not clear if those inside were as aware of the imminent danger as the witnesses outside. (Of course, the video takes place only over 1 minute and with my slow connection, there are several pauses creating distortion in the actual time lapse. Upon reflection, one minute doesn't seem long enough to comprehend the situation and make a decision- or to run down three flights of stairs.)
As I drive through the streets of Kin, I often imagine taking a series of photos of the many buildings in their various stages of completion. The architecture is something to marvel at, with its many styles and inspirations- the one common thread being a flourish of grandeur. Round, arched windows, spiraling staircases, balconies and overhangs, massive guardian gates that reflect the intricate patterns of metalwork. Like the proverbial book however, architecture cannot be judged by it's cover. It requires discipline, adherence to law and the integrity to follow safety rules despite any consequence to higher costs. All of these challenging qualities to come by in Kin.
The problem of course lies within the means of achieving this prosperous goal. The article suggests that faulty materials used in the building may be the cause of the collapse. I am left to wonder who exactly, if anyone, knew about the inferior metal.
Was it the owner of the building, hoping to cut a few corners and save some cash? Was it the construction company themselves, hoping to shave dollars off the cost and pocket the difference? Was it the vendor of the iron bars- knowing the material was not suitable for such construction but selling it anyway?
Other questions abound as well- often I have wondered about the half-built buildings and the people that inhabit them, whether new owners of apartments or squatters who've found a temporary place to stay. It's not a sight I am accustomed to seeing in the US- half- formed buildings already open for business. I'm pretty sure there is some kind of inspection process required at several stages of construction and again upon completion.
The rescue team surely had it's work cut out. It was dismaying to read that perhaps witnesses heard the cries of children (or the cries of anyone) that were unable to be found. Watching the building go down, it appeared there was time to get out, though it is not clear if those inside were as aware of the imminent danger as the witnesses outside. (Of course, the video takes place only over 1 minute and with my slow connection, there are several pauses creating distortion in the actual time lapse. Upon reflection, one minute doesn't seem long enough to comprehend the situation and make a decision- or to run down three flights of stairs.)
As I drive through the streets of Kin, I often imagine taking a series of photos of the many buildings in their various stages of completion. The architecture is something to marvel at, with its many styles and inspirations- the one common thread being a flourish of grandeur. Round, arched windows, spiraling staircases, balconies and overhangs, massive guardian gates that reflect the intricate patterns of metalwork. Like the proverbial book however, architecture cannot be judged by it's cover. It requires discipline, adherence to law and the integrity to follow safety rules despite any consequence to higher costs. All of these challenging qualities to come by in Kin.
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